female experience: insult after insult, constant threat of being killed (leads to hyper awareness of futility of existence), conditioned to value kindness while being subject to violence daily (leads to desire of understanding of human psyche) adoration a key emotion
white male experience: view world as hall of mirrors, everything is me and i am everything (leads to individualist interpretation of social reality, inability to make good art)
every time i feel anxious i recall zadie smith’s words in white teeth about how no one deserves love all the time, that all we deserve is food, water, and shelter. i do not think she was calling for self-abasement but asking us to make our own way for ourselves, to expect from the world as much as we work to cull from it, and to take losses in stride as an inevitable portion of life’s offerings.
[W]e live in a sexually liberal society, not a liberated one. A truly liberated society is one where sex is value-neutral and not having sex is just as acceptable as having a lot of it.
The fact that asexuals are considered weird, sick, abnormal, mentally ill, repressed, etc is a bold indicator that we are not living in a sexually liberated society but in a liberalized one.